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About Jürgen Schmechel

I am a keen observer of human psychology, and a master in NLP(Neuro Linguistic Programming), Ericksonian Hypnosis and am a certified Results Coach. I love numbers and and am known for my strong logical, analytical and numerical abilities. For years I have used these skills to serve exceptional good workflow models in business, but now, have discovered how my skills can be used to create the foundations of long, loving relationships.

Recent Blog

Divorces involving kids

In the beginning of your relationship, there are a couple of phases that are super critical for the chance of having a long-lasting relationship.

The first phase is when you move in with each other. In this phase, you learn more about yourself and about your partner than in all the months or years of dating before.

No longer can you now ignore the un-tidiness of your partner nor the way they like to organise things. During your time of dating, that might have been a small annoyance – now it is visible in plain sight.

And even more crucial than tidiness or organisational talents is the way your partner handles money.

Why?

Because moving in with each other is – even in the 21st century – also an economic decision. A major part of your living costs (rent, groceries, and insurances) are now shared.

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Compared to what…?

In one of his famous poems the German poet and author Bertold Brecht notes –

“What do you do” – Mr. Nebody was asked, “when you love a person”.
“I take a blueprint of this person” – he responded “and see to it that they are going to be alike”
“What, the blueprint?” – “No, the person”

You see, comparison is one of the great dangers in your relationship.

You might have seen me comment before that the gap between your expectations and the reality is one of the biggest stressors within a relationship. 

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Create Your Future

We all have a metaphorical chest full of memories, experiences and – for lack of a better word – trauma. That’s the baggage we all carry with us through our lives.

Not talking about these things, not acknowledging that they are there is dangerous for your relationship.

I always recommend to have many active appointments in your relationship, and one of the most important reasons for this is because it gives you both an opportunity to exchange stories and trauma from each other’s past.

Now, your future is even more important.

Why? Because you have the chance to create it. You can learn from your past experiences and traumas, and use the lessons learned and wisdom gained to craft a relationship that you really want.

This is your life, it is your relationship, and these are your dreams. No one else can create your future but yourself.

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“I thoroughly enjoyed this workshop and wished my husband was able to attend too. Some very simple yet often overlooked ideas and heeps of prompts and tips to improve and enhance a relationship. It was direct, honest and enlightening – left feeling uplifted, inspired and determined to do better!”

Susie C, Seaforth

Why Money Is More Important Than Sex

“I have just finished reading this book. It is beautifully designed and a very easy read, full of great tips on how to get the best out of your relationship. This would make a great gift for newly engaged or married couples so they can avoid all the things that lead to relationship breakdown.” Liz Koh, Moneymax, NZ

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