Time. It is such a precious thing.
We all have the same amount of hours and seconds each day, yet we all feel at times that we’d do anything to get more of it. That there isn’t enough of it. We even question how to slow it down.
The real question we should be asking ourselves is how do we best use time to ensure to the outcome we desire.
During my school years in Germany, we were asked to write an essay discussing the following statement:
“You waste most of your time trying to save time.”
The phrase has never left me, and on a daily basis, I am reminded of its poignance.
Every time I rush through the house trying to catch the bus in time, without fail, I knock something over, or bump my head trying to find my shoes or I forget to take my wallet. I’m losing or wasting time by the attempt to gain time.
One of the models I’ve created for my relationship mentoring is the 168 hour model.
You know, a week has exactly 168 hours for each and every one of us.
The big question is, how do we spend those precious hours and how could we improve the way we divide our time to get the outcome we desire?
My recommendation to you as a couple is to start by writing down as accurately as possible how you both allocate your time throughout a normal week.
Your list should be as detailed as possible, and should contain hours dedicated to sleep (including end of day and start of day routines), work (including commuting), children, laundry, groceries, cooking, gym, friends, TV, gaming, sex, Facebook, internet, Netflix, Me-Time, Talking and any other activities you regularly take part in.
Once you have both done this, you may find that you are actually left with very little time at the end of each week to truly connect with your partner. Looking at your list may open your eyes to see where there might be a chance of shifting tasks from one to the other – freeing up time you could spend together and enjoy each other’s company.
As a tip, instead of creating a listwith all these things, you could also put your data into a circle graph. It will make your results of this challenge more visible for you.
Maybe this challenge is a good start for you both to acknowledge what things each of you are pre-occupied with, or where you could free up some time together to focus on your relationship.
By the way, the best way to discuss the findings of this little 168-hour-exercise is by actually by going out together and not being at home. Detach yourself from the situation at home and take an hour to present your circle or list to each other. You might want to help each other to find areas where you could really save time.
If you want some further support with this exercise or discuss your relationship in general, please book a free 15-minutes call with me here.